Ask Molly Ringwald: my husband self-medicates with alcohol. What do I do?

‘If he’s able to see what he is in danger of losing, perhaps he will make the decision to seek the help he needs’

My husband of seven years suffers from depression and anxiety, and medicates with alcohol. It’s got worse over time, but he denies it, thinks he’s normal and makes out I’m the crazy one for pointing it out. We have a six-year-old daughter, and I stay for her because I know it will be a bloody fight if we separate. But it is hard to take care of myself in the midst of it all. What can I do?

You don’t have the power to control your husband’s actions, but you do have the power to control your own. You also have the obligation to protect your daughter from being hurt (either emotionally or physically). There are many different treatments for alcoholism, but I believe they are successful only if the person in question admits to themselves that they have a problem, and clearly your strategies aren’t working. It’s time to look at other options.

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